A Formula for More Authentic Presence

 

we all are

 

‘     “I am trying to cultivate a life style that does not require my presence.”

Gary Trudeau

 I was going through a bunch of old notes last week and came across this formula for “Authentic Presence”. I don’t know where I initially discovered it – so my apologies to its author for the missing attribution. 

 Increasingly, I find that one important question I can ask leaders I work with is – how present are you in your communication with others?  While listening is critical – staying present in the moment carries the weight of what you are trying to communicate.

Their answers are often surprising.  Often there is little understanding of what being fully present means. 

Is asking the right questions enough, they ask? Others don’t want to seem overly emotional. Some don’t feel comfortable with the “intimacy.” And yes, there are some that confide that they just don’t care enough – or feel they just want people to do “what they are expected to do”. 

The roots of this kind of communication stem from the still-pervasive but very old command and control mindset.  I’ve told them what to do. People are paid to do a job. Why should they be coddled?  Continue reading

Organizational Leaders Can’t Fix People

 

modern-times026

Charlie Chaplin, Modern Times, 1936

Last week, in the middle of an important project, my printer stopped working. My first response was frustration and then I shifted into figuring out what went wrong. It turned out that the problem had to do with the cartridge and all that was needed to fix it was to replace it with a new part. Done –  not very exciting or interesting news. But, it got me thinking about how organizations still go about dealing with change and human dynamics.

In my attempt to resolve the problem with my printer I took a linear approach; get to the source of the problem and replace it with a new part. I can’t begin to tell you how often I hear stories from the workplace that reveal the same approach to efforts to ‘fix” what’s broken – a program, a communication issue, a person. In fix-it cultures, concerned more with quick results, this poses major obstacles to the massive changes needed to shift mindsets towards greater resiliency, transparency and collaboration.

In the thousands of books and articles written about change management, less emphasis has been placed on so-called “soft” management – leadership, motivation and human dynamics. In his article, Why Change Management Fails in Organizations, Ray Williams point out that  “change success in large organizations depends on persuading hundreds or thousands of groups and individuals to change the way they work, a transformation people will accept only if they can be persuaded to think differently about their jobs. In effect, CEOs must alter the mind-sets of their employees-no easy task. I would add to their conclusion that individuals in organizations, to embrace change, must also engage in a process that changes how they think about themselves, not just their job.”  Continue reading

Changing Your Habitual Responses


freedom

“Freedom is the ability to pause between the stimulus and the response.” Rollo May

Beware of quick fix formulas! On this we can mostly all agree.

The E + R = O (EVENT + RESPONSE = OUTCOME) formula, which we picked up on from Jack Canfield’s – The Success Principles How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, is an effective, practical and not a quick fix tool that can help you to change the way you work – and live.

Why?

Because to use it, you have to change the way you think. Doable – yes! Easy – no!

Here’s how it works. Continue reading

Being Human At Work

baby with chocolate 2

People are not tasks or robots. I’m still surprised when I meet people in the workplace who don’t believe that people are the most important part of their jobs.  Sadly, the people are a means to my end meme still dominates. Granted, many people are disengaged, burnt out and disempowered – and can’t summon up the energy to deal with diverse personalities and needs and intense organizational pressures and demands.

Most of the business world is still organized on the principle that a job is essentially an economic transaction.  Workers are being asked to do more with less –and faster than ever before. Employee head count is down and the bar for performance set higher. And managers still don’t seem to understand how to establish a workplace environment that view workers as people. An over reliance on the rational (we’re here to work!) and on emotions that don’t feed the human spirit (anxiety, mistrust, resentment, frustration) all contribute to the sense of exhaustion and disillusionment that many employees feel. Continue reading

Engaging The Unengaged: Part 2

In Part 1 of Engaging the Unengaged, I refer to studies by the Gallup Workforce Survey. which have consistently placed the spotlight on organizational leaders’s weak “people skills” as a major factor in disengagement.

One major recurring theme in the studies is the importance of the positive relational dynamics that help co-workers feel connected to their work and a supportive workplace culture.

While these interpersonal skills may sound basic, it’s often surprising how many employees lack or ignore their value in promoting cooperation and good communication. Without question, these skills play a fundamental role in promoting engagement at work.

Continue reading